tosie_bonner

Where'd I go?

Fri, 17 Jul 2009 17:19:17 GMT

Sorry to disappear on y'all. I suffered some personal trauma, and it did a number on me. I'll relay the story at another time (or if I see you in person), but it sucked.

On the bad side, the emotions I ran through...it felt like breaking up with a loved one. You know, where you're lightheaded and can't think and nauseous and can't sleep and just want to curl up in a ball. Then you spend the next couple of days feeling hungover and exhausted. Well, that's basically what I went through.

On the good side, no one is dying, I'm not breaking up with a loved one, and in the grand scheme of things...this is actually a pretty small deal. It just feels big now.

I'll be okay, I just don't want to type about it right now.

And tonight, I've got to go to my 20 year high school reunion. It's funny, but I was really looking forward to this a year ago. Remember when I lost all that weight? I thought it would be fun going there looking "healthy." But now that the event has gotten closer, I find myself saying, "Eh..."

There are really only two people I'm looking forward to seeing. One, however, just told me he probably won't go, but the other will be there. I'm not expecting much out of the experience, but I'll keep my fingers crossed that I'll be pleasantly surprised.

For those that pray out there, send a couple my way if you got a sec. I want to get over this haze soon.

Some great news though (so I'll end on a happy note), my sister's twin babies are coming home from the hospital today. THESE are the things in life that are important. Peace!

Funny links!

X-POSITION X-TRA: Peter David - an article I wrote recently that I'm pretty darn proud of:
http://www.comicbookresources.com/?page=article&id=22080

Jonah Hill And Robert De Niro To Fuck With The Wrong Mexican In Rodriguez' MACHETE?
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41723

Scarlett looks mighty fine as a redhead...
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41715

How to script a gunfight:
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2009/now-thats-a-gunfight

Chewie, Darth Vader, Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Leia and R2D2 - ah, memories...
http://imgur.com/We2Gt.jpg

George Lucas is Hollywood's Highest Paid with $170M/Year:
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/07/george-lucas-is-hwoods-highest-paid

The 69 Sexiest Photos Of Girls Dressed As Wonder Woman:
http://www.manofest.com/Content/the-69-sexiest-photos-of-girls-dressed-as-wonder-woman.html

The Complete History Of Lawsuits Brought Against Sacha Baron Cohen (in handy-dandy graph form):
http://www.moviefill.com/Sacha-Baron-Cohen-Lawsuits-Not-Very-Nice-17579/

I love the Opera!

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 16:50:00 GMT

So it was getting near bedtime for my kiddos last night, and my wife suggested we (me and her) watch a DVD. My kids were present, so naturally, questions ensued:

MY SEVEN YEAR OLD SON: What movie are you going to watch?

ME: Probably something that's not age appropriate for you.

MY SON: Like what?

ME: I don't know. What kind of movie would mommy like?

MY FIVE YEAR OLD DAUGHTER: Opera!

ME: Opera? I didn't know mom was a fan, but okay...

MY SON: A cooking movie!

ME: Okay, that makes sense. Mommy TIVO's the cooking shows...

I think about all the other shows my wife TIVO's. I suddenly realize something and turn to my daughter.

ME: Oh, Oprah!

MY DAUGHTER: Yeah, Opera!

***

Kids say the darndest things!

Funny links!

Ryan Reynolds Is Green Lantern - not the choice I would've made, but I'm sure he'll do a great job:
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41662

There's nothing gay about washing your roommate's back. Unless you're both dudes. Then it's gay:
http://www.ejb.com/video/20878/Get_my_back.html

10 Funniest First Drafts Of Famous Movie Lines:
http://www.trailertrasher.com/2009/07/10-funniest-first-drafts-of-famous.html

What do you do with good news?

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 17:46:45 GMT

Yesterday I got some awesome news! But my mind doesn't know how to process it. The news is the equivalent of: "Hey, you have a 1% chance of becoming a millionaire."

Now, a 1% chance is great when you compare it to the lottery, but it's still a 1% chance.

At first I got light-headed and did a happy dance, but then I sat around all day and convinced myself not to get too excited...which is kinda dumb and smart at the same time.

It's smart, of course, because I shouldn't get my hopes up in case the 99% odds occur and I "lose." It's less of a distance for my hopes to crash if I never allow them to get too high.

But it's dumb in the fact that this is great news! I should celebrate it! It's something I've earned! How many moments in life will I have the POSSIBILITY of great news?

I want to sing it from the highest mountains! I want to make a T-shirt that says the news and wear it!

But then the other part of me is afraid when that 99% odds kicks in. I'm worried I'll feel like a fool, or that I'll have to answer a hundred questions from folks I've told who ask me later, "Did you win?"

...and, naturally, now you want to know what that news is. For those that read this, the next time I talk to you in person, I'll fill you in.

I know, I know - I'm being vague.

Aaargh! I wish I wasn't such a neurotic nanny-pants (is that a word?).

I guess the rule I'm going by is celebrate internally (and with the handful of folks that matter most to you), but play it cool externally.

"Cool" - like I know the meaning of that word. Nertz. Everyone, have a beer for me tonight in honor of my cryptic message here. Yay!

Funny links!

Mel Gibson May Stick His Hand In Jodie Foster's BEAVER - it's not what you think, but I like the title:
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41654

Ryan Reynolds Up For GREEN LANTERN Alongside Cooper and Timberlake!
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41650

'Bruno' Bestows His Top Ten Upon America:
http://defamer.gawker.com/5311444/bruno-bestows-his-top-ten-upon-america

The USB Powered Chainsaw - Best. USB Peripheral. Ever:
http://blogs.laweekly.com/style_council/weird/usb-powered-chainsaw/

14 Tattoos In Need Of A Spellcheck:
http://www.kontraband.com/pics/18499/MOAR-Misspelled-Tattoos/

The 6 Most Baffling Superheroes from Around the World:
http://www.cracked.com/article_17514_6-most-baffling-superheroes-from-around-world.html

Top 10 Female Reporters Being Harassed On Live TV:
http://www.manofest.com/Content/top-10-female-reporters-being-harrassed-on-live-tv/Page-2.html

The bizarre ending to a bootleg foreign Batman film. Features an unmasked Batman and Robin singing a parody of At The Hop with Joker and Penguin...and a dancing midget in a Spider-Man suit:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RiElEQxGsdw

11 Photos Where Black People Were Awkwardly Photoshopped In or Out:
http://www.11points.com/Misc/11_Photos_Where_Black_People_Were_Awkwardly_Photoshopped_In_or_Out

Calm down, it's just a lamp...an AWESOME lamp!
http://10.media.tumblr.com/udm8YMYs769fegatLH5EOBU7_r1_500.jpg

I'm an uncle...again!

Thu, 09 Jul 2009 16:49:37 GMT

For the fourth time this summer, I've become an uncle. The little guy's name is Owen, he's my wife's sister's kid, and he's a cutie. Our Christmas gift buying list has doubled in terms of nephews/nieces, but I couldn't be happier. :)

This weekend is me and the wifey's 15th wedding anniversary. Sounds like a long time, huh? I still remember all the details of meeting her, proposing to her, and marrying her. Some of my best days ever!

I wish you all the kind of happiness I've had!

Funny links!

Well, Here's One Way To Kick Start A New SUPERMAN Film...
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41639

New Restricted FUNNY PEOPLE trailer hits!
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41630

World Of Whorecraft - This Has To Be Read To Be Believed:
http://www.bleedingcool.com/2009/07/09/world-of-whorecraft-this-has-to-be-read-to-be-believed/

About the Confederacy of Dunces...
http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/07/confederacy-of-dunces.html

HistoryBlock Keeps Web Sites From Your History:
http://lifehacker.com/5310961/historyblock-keeps-web-sites-from-your-history

Nine Must-Have Features We Want to See in a Google OS:
http://lifehacker.com/5309937/nine-must+have-features-we-want-to-see-in-a-google-os

LaCie's LaCinema Rugged HD Enclosure Outputs 1080p Video, Ruggedly:
http://gizmodo.com/5310445/lacies-lacinema-rugged-hd-enclosure-outputs-1080p-video-ruggedly

Run Pee for iPhone makes moviegoing bladders happier:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjqdRYgiTsQ

Some helpful household usage tips for all those old sex toys you have just lying around collecting dust:
http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/household/

I haven't taken a lunch in forever...

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 20:58:15 GMT

Dammit.

Back to work still sucking up WAY too much of my time.

On the plus side, my son was singing "We're not gonna take it" by Twisted Sister the other day. Thanks Guitar Hero!

Funny links!

Google To Battle Microsoft For PC OS - this ought to be interesting:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/the-brave-new-world-of-chrome-google-to-battle-microsoft-for-pc-os/
http://googleblog.blogspot.com/2009/07/introducing-google-chrome-os.html

The Ten Most Important Moments of the Michael Jackson Memorial Mess:
http://defamer.gawker.com/5309458/the-ten-most-important-moments-of-the-michael-jackson-memorial-mess

Top Ten Messages On Sarah Palin's Answering Machine:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/07/08/top-ten-messages-on-sarah_n_227583.html

Speed Up Your Downloads by Choosing the Fastest Torrents:
http://lifehacker.com/5310210/speed-up-your-downloads-by-choosing-the-fastest-torrents

5 Things You Didn't Know about South Park:
http://www.askmen.com/entertainment/special_feature_150/192_special_feature.html

Batgirl, Catwoman and Wonder Woman in One Awesome Commercial:
http://www.bamkapow.com/batgirl-catwoman-and-wonder-woman-all-in-one-video-3608-p.html

The Most Terrifying Child "Safety" Illustrations You'll See Today:
http://www.retrocomedy.com/2009/07/top-8-terrifying-child-safety.html

5 Largest Games of Beer Pong Ever Played:
http://www.manolith.com/2009/07/06/top-5-largest-games-of-beer-pong-ever-played/

Stock up for a Slim Jim shortage...
http://blogs.moneycentral.msn.com/topstocks/archive/2009/07/06/is-slim-jim-an-endangered-species.aspx

Another busy day...

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 00:16:02 GMT

So here's a story from my godbrother. He heard it at his job where he works with a bunch of engineers. Hopefully, he won't mind if I share it (and if he does - too bad). Take it away, Yianni...

"So, Dino (the guy who sits next to me) was just telling me about a meeting he went to (awhile ago) where the person running the slides (they used transparencies at the time) put up an org chart, and the guy at the top (whose name was Hank Proctor) was listed as "Head Negro."

"As a bonus, he was, in fact, a black person.

"Apparently the explanation for this was that, at the time, the Microsoft application they used to make the slides recognized "Engr" (the commonly used abbreviation for "Engineer") as a mis-spelling. The default option from the spellchecker was... you guessed it....Negro."

***

Makes you wonder what would the spell-checker would've done if Hank had come from Niger...

Funny links!

Stupid fight...but you have to wait for the end:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JJtO5241vY&NR=1

The X-Men hook-up chart - if you've f*cked one X-Men, you've f*cked them all:
http://www.uncannyxmen.net/images/article/relationship/relationshipmapv1_files/gif_1.htm

Yianni's brother sent me this:
http://www.mosnews.com/weird/2009/07/07/strongvagina/

A Michael Jackson Story...

Mon, 06 Jul 2009 16:14:40 GMT

Because I haven't done anything except whine about work, I'll tell you a story. How about a Michael Jackson story in memoriam? Here we go...

I was 16 years old, and Michael Jackson was coming to Seattle on tour for the "Bad" CD. Now - understand - at the time, M.J. wasn't the freakshow he is today. He was the ultimate entertainer, and seeing him in concert was akin to seeing the Beatles live in their heyday. I knew the odds of getting tickets were long, but I thought I'd give it a shot.

I went to the mall (no online or phone sales at the time) and got in line around 6am - that was the earliest I was willing to get up and try to get tickets. The line was already huuuge, but the ticket window didn't open till 9am. And by the time it did open? The line had grown exponentially.

I kept my fingers crossed, and figured I had an okay shot at some semi-crappy seats.

Well, the ticket window opened promptly at 9am and began to move. Then it moved some more. More. And more. And then, just before 10am, I was less than 10 people from the ticket window when...SOLD OUT!

Denied!!!

Me and a few hundred other people cleared out and went to our cars. I started up my car, turned on the radio, and slowly moved through the parking lot. The DJ on the radio was being cheery (and annoying)...

"Amazing! The Michael Jackson tour completely sold out in just 57 minutes! Can you believe it? Well, for those of you who didn't get tickets, don't you fret...Michael has just added one more day to his tour! Tickets are on sale NOW!!!"

HOWBUTWHAT?!?!?!?

I looked around the parking lot. Every car there was spinning around and grabbing a parking space.

I hadn't gotten that far, so I grabbed the nearest space and sprinted for the ticket booth again. I was third in line!

People were running for the line, hurrying for a spot. Some were bitter that they had left after the first round (and who could blame them?).

The ticket window opened, and they started selling tickets for the second date. I bought a pair...and got seats in the 8th freakin' row!!!

Best luck ever!

I didn't know who I was going to take. I didn't want to waste them on some girl who was more interested in M.J. than me, and I didn't want to go with a guy (which just seemed weird). So my Mom suggested I go with a girl who had been a childhood friend...but I kinda always wanted to make more. She said "yes" and my mind reeled with the possibilities.

We had come so close to "hooking up" previously, but I was too damn shy. I told myself though that if even the smallest opportunity presented itself at this show, I'd go for it.

The day of the show arrived. I washed my car thoroughly inside and out. I was a teenager and had the hormones to prove it.

I was driving home, debating if giving her flowers would be too forward, when I heard on the radio..."Oooh! There is going to be a lot of disappointed fans out there today. It seems Michael Jackson has come down with laryngitis and has had to cancel his appearance tonight. His concert schedule is tight, but his people have said he will try to make it back here at the tail end of his Bad tour..."

Eff me.

I should've tried to get my "friend" to go to a movie or something instead, but I didn't. I think she was kinda seeing someone at her high school, and changing venues from a concert to a movie would have definitely crossed over into the "date" category.

So I guess I was just another underage youth Michael Jackson had screwed...sans wine.

And, no, I never did get another chance to hook up with my "friend," so I'll console myself with my beautiful wife and kids. C'est la vie!

Funny links!

Let's all sing together now...
http://imgur.com/P9qJ3.jpg

STARSHIP TROOPERS’ Neil Patrick Harris Will Host THE EMMYS - Personally, I'm kinda excited about this:
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41597

Boborci. Kurtzman. Kane. VIEWMASTER. Movie - I'm going to pitch Hollywood on "Pet Rock - The Movie":
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41601

Check out the red band trailer for JENNIFER'S BODY featuring copious Megan Fox skin and an f-bomb!
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41607

Cablevision and the Supreme Court:
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2009/cablevision-and-the-supreme-court

Writing tip - Beating jokes:
http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/07/writing-tip-beating-jokes.html

Five Best Online Image Editors:
http://lifehacker.com/5307419/five-best-online-image-editors

5 Bizarre Sexual Conditions That Can Ruin Your Life:
http://www.cracked.com/article_17503_5-bizarre-sexual-conditions-that-can-ruin-your-life.html

Dude vs. Airbag Installed In His Couch:
http://www.ejb.com/video/20835/Airbag_couch_prank.html

40 Unfortunately Named Restaurants:
http://www.manofest.com/Content/40-unfortunately-named-restaurants.html

Dad, will you take care of me?

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 17:33:22 GMT

It's my son's and daughter's birthday tomorrow (they're born on the same day...two years apart). Anyhow, they're getting Nintendo DS's. They've been asking for them since Christmas.

Whenever kids ask for big gifts, ask for something in return (yes, I'm a jerk that way). I told the kids if they're good, get good grades, do what Mommy and Daddy say (and all that good stuff), they'd their DS's. And, yes, my kids are VERY good. ;)

Back to the story...so my son has been asking me for the past month, "Did you get my DS yet? I'm getting my DS? I've been good..."

So about two weeks ago, I said to my boy, "You've been good, right? Do you trust me?"

And for some reason, he always pauses, but then responds, "...yessss."

Then I tell him, "Daddy will take care of you. Trust me."

So, for the past two weeks, he's now been saying things like, "Daddy, I know you're taking care of me, but if you don't have the DS yet, they sell it at Toys R Us."

Or, my favorite - he looks at me and hesitantly asks, "Daddy, you're taking care of me, right?"

To which I respond, "Every day for the rest of my life."

I love that guy!

Funny links!

International INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS trailer is pretty damn awesome!
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41571

Paramount Approaches Rivals Sony & Fox - smart, but scary:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/paramount-approaches-rivals-sony-fox/

An interesting read on the per-screen average:
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2009/per-screen-average

How to Crack a Wi-Fi Network's WEP Password with BackTrack:
http://lifehacker.com/5305094/how-to-crack-a-wi+fi-networks-wep-password-with-backtrack

The 7 Most Pathetic G.I. Joe Characters:
http://www.cracked.com/article_17474_7-most-pathetic-gi-joe-characters.html

Awww, nuts...
http://www.ejb.com/video/20820/Nut_smash_trick.html

The Worst Best-Man Speeches Of All Time. Or at least on YouTube:
http://www.asylum.com/2009/06/26/best-man-speeches-the-best-of-the-worst/

Okay, posting through July 6 will be kind of sporadic...

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 18:29:23 GMT

Sorry, work suckage. Honestly, it should get better after that date.

...it better.

Funny links!

My son does this in the bathroom. Look what will happen if I don't train him differently...
http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=41722

Awesome review of new Transformers movie - Read it even if you had no desire to see Transformers 2 (and, after, you almost certainly won't):
http://io9.com/5301898/michael-bay-finally-made-an-art-movie?skyline=true&s=i

I know, I know...

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 17:59:35 GMT

Work is kicking my ass. Just hang in for one more week!

(I'm actually talking to myself with that last sentence.)

So, Farrah and Michael Jackson died yesterday...and I feel bad for Farrah. She a B-lister - a has-been - who was just starting to get a little notoriety. She passes away and makes headlines...for about two hours.

Michael Jackson dies, and it's...Farrah who?

And you know in Hollywood everyone is going to go to MJ's funeral.

Farrah - even in death, she gets no respect.

It'd be a comedy if it wasn't so tragic...okay, it's a bit of a comedy.

Have a good weekend!

Funny links!

Daybreakers - a cool looking movie with a cool premise:
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809912192/video/14159298

The 50 Funniest Street Signs Of All Time:
http://www.manofest.com/Content/the-50-funniest-street-signs-of-all-time.html

The Many, Many Versions of Michael Jackson's Thriller. You know, since MJ died and all
http://www.gunaxin.com/the-many-versions-of-michael-jacksons-thriller/22910

It's late and I'm still at work...

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 01:12:10 GMT

I've got a head cold and I'm a masochist. That's all...

Funny links!

It's Buffy's Fault That Vampires Are Weak Now:
http://io9.com/5299054/its-buffys-fault-that-vampires-are-weak-now

Nothing Says "I'm a Dork, Marry Me" Like a Giant Lego Wedding Ring:
http://gizmodo.com/5301459/nothing-says-im-a-dork-marry-me-like-a-giant-lego-wedding-ring

Five Ways to Get More from Boxee:
http://lifehacker.com/5301431/five-ways-to-get-more-from-boxee

Large Collection of Cartoon Characters Re-Imagined In Other Mediums (i.e. Charlie Brown as anime, etc.):
http://www.friki.net/fotos/3082-la-realidad-alterna-muy-bueno.html

Playing baseball with a samurai sword seems to kind of miss the point of actually hitting a baseball, but that doesn't make it any less badass:
http://www.sportsrubbish.com/2009/06/23/baseball/samurai-cuts-baseball-in-half-with-sword-video/

A hard time to be an indie - a take on indies that I happen to agree with:
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2009/hard-indie
John's article begins as a riff on the following:
http://www.indiewire.com/article/2009/06/20/james_d._stern_making_smarter_movies_or_i_need_the_eggs_-_now_what/P1/

Monday made my eyeballs bleed...

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 17:33:44 GMT

Waaay too much work. That's why I didn't post - so sorry! Today's not looking much better either...

How about a funny kid story?

So it was Father's Day, and my six year old son was writing cards for family members. On my brother-in-law's card (my sister's husband), he drew a picture of my brother-in-law and wrote "Best Thio" (that's uncle in Greek) across his chest.

I looked at it and admired my boy's artwork.

ME: That's great! But what about Thio Athan (my brother)? Don't you want him to feel like the best too?

MY SON: Oh yeah! I'll make him one too!

So my son draws a card for my brother, writes "Best Thio" across a picture of Thio Athan, and hands me his collection of cards.

We go to a Father's Day barbecue at my brother's house, and card/gift time rolls around. I hand out the cards my son has made. Five seconds later, my brother starts laughing loudly.

ME: What? Not a good likeness of you?

MY BROTHER: Did you read the card?

ME: Yeah, "Best Thio..."

MY BROTHER: Didn't you see the ribbon?

I took the card from my brother and looked at it. It did say "Best Thio" across the chest, but then - underneath that - was a small ribbon with the words "2nd Place" on it.

Heh, kids...don't you love 'em?

Funny links!

THE LAST AIRBENDER trailer - eh...
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41492

MMC Acquires Deadline Hollywood Daily - in case you care...
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/mmc-acquires-deadline-hollywood-daily/

Star Trek inspirational posters:
http://echosphere.net/star_trek_insp/star_trek_insp.html

Buying comics digitally - as soon as they have a decent color e-Reader:
http://www.comicbookresources.com/?page=article&id=21693

Ed McMahon RIP - Johnny's saved him a spot on the couch:
http://occasionalsuperheroine.blogspot.com/2009/06/ed-mcmahon-rip.html

Johnny Depp As Mad Hatter, Helena Bonham Carter's Red Queen And Anne Hathaway's White Queen - this is gonna scare the crap outta some kids:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/06/22/johnny-depp-as-mad-hatter_n_218747.html

Top 10 Funniest Video Game Commercials:
http://www.leveloneboss.com/2009/06/top-10-funniest-video-game-commercials.html#top

2 Girls 1 Cup skateboard:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mojoey/3645908102/

The Ten Greatest (Real) Prison Breaks Throughout History:
http://www.wired.com/culture/culturereviews/magazine/17-07/st_best

Yup, it's Friday...

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 16:46:15 GMT

Hot damn!

It's my boy's last day of school, so I'm taking him out to see "Night at the Museum: Battle for the Smithsonian." After all, we've been entering the contest every morning.

Hey - don't forget to call your fathers this Sunday!

Happy Daddy's Day to me!

Funny links!

Comic Writers - How To Find An Artist!!!
http://occasionalsuperheroine.blogspot.com/2009/06/comic-writers-how-to-find-artist.html

What if dinosaurs said "Hey!":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prgm4eKq6d4&eurl=http%3A%2F%2F

Wait for the end of this...heh:
http://jalopnik.com/5294660/theres-a-lesson-to-be-learned-when-transporting-hot-pig-slop

Pixar grants girl's dying wish to see 'Up':
http://www.ocregister.com/articles/pixar-up-movie-2468059-home-show

A shoeburger - mmmm...
http://www.media.desicolours.com/2009/june/burger.jpg

6 Valuable (And Disgusting) Ways They're Reusing Human Waste:
http://www.cracked.com/article_17456_6-valuable-disgusting-ways-theyre-reusing-human-waste.html

I'd watch a Care Bears vs. My Little Pony movie:
http://www.atom.com/funny_videos/meth_toy_movies/?brand=gorilla

Passed Out On The Toilet - A Photo Essay:
http://www.holytaco.com/passed-out-toilet

Just got a great job review from my boss...

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 18:55:00 GMT

Too bad there's a salary freeze at my workplace.

*Sigh*

An amusing fact about my son - he is a marketing person's wet dream. If a company has a website, he will visit it. If he sees an ad on TV or in a magazine, he will remember that product and desire it.

Recently, we purchased a box of mac & cheese. On it, Kraft said they are holding a contest for a trip to the Smithsonian (to market the new "Night at the Museum" movie). You go and enter the code on their website, and it tells you if you won.

He bugged me every night since he read about the contest to go online and enter the code. After a couple of days of this, I took him downstairs, we went to their site and entered the code.

Naturally, we didn't win. But...

After you enter, it says to come back and enter your code every day for another chance to win. Unfortunately, my son read this (darn those reading abilities).

Now, every morning at 7am, I get woken up with a "Let's go enter the code!"

Friggin' Kraft.

Funny links!

Trailer for the new Fame - I like it...and yes, I'm kinda gay that way:
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810033914/video/14007801

WME Pay For Assistants Worse Than WMA - if you're starting out in Hollywood, you may want to read this:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/wme-pay-for-assistants-worse-than-wma/

An interesting idea for indie films:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/indie-fans-have-new-alphabet-ifc-hd-vod/

The Hunter hardcover graphic novel - a comic all of you should pick up when it comes out:
http://www.eyeoncomics.com/?p=423#more-423

Wii Bowling Ball - Tear It Up Like Jesus:
http://gizmodo.com/5295526/wii-bowling-ball-tear-it-up-like-jesus

Too much going on...

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 18:10:53 GMT

I want to write my script.

I need to finish the website project.

I want to work on my comic script.

I need to complete my boss' special project.

I need to organize the mess in my office.

I want to watch a movie.

My head's exploding in a dozen different directions, but I'm making it one day at a time. And someday soon, I hope to post something interesting.

I promise I will!

I'll add it to the list above.

Funny links!

Trailer for Popatopolis - a documentary by a fella I went to school with. Looks like my kind of film!
http://www.popatopolis.com/trailer.shtml

Lifehacker Pack 2009 - Our List of Essential Free Mac Downloads:
http://lifehacker.com/5291841/lifehacker-pack-2009-our-list-of-essential-free-mac-downloads

Cheetos-flavored kisses - yum?
http://blogofhilarity.com/2009/06/17/okay-this-is-just-disgusting

Funny guys at my office...

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 16:13:09 GMT

I have a standing desk at my office. That means it's adjusted so I can stand while I work. Well, over the past couple of weeks, I've been noticing that it's slowly been shrinking. As it's adjustable, I was thinking the tension that keeps it standing has been giving out.

Today, I showed up to work almost on time and caught my coworkers lowering my desk. It turns out they've been doing this for a little while.

Hilarious!

Payback's a bitch though. Little do they know that I've been...wait. One of those guys reads this blog.

You're screwed.

Funny links!

The Status Of Studio Development Coffers - Disney Running On Empty, Sony Filling Up:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/the-status-of-studio-development-coffers-disney-busted-sony-flush/

Video Spoof - Every Week On 'Entourage':
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/video-spoof-every-week-on-entourage/

The only one who has seen the movie - an interesting observation by John August:
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2009/seen-the-movie

Ohmigosh! Vince liked the remake of Pelham!!!!!
http://www.vincekeenan.com/2009/06/movie-taking-of-pelham-123-2009-come-on.htm

The Most Ridiculous Hamburgers, From The $5,000 Burger To The Canned Cheeseburger:
http://www.trendhunter.com/slideshow/heart-attack-grill-burger

Other than getting married, this is the best way to insure you'll never get another blowjob from a particular woman again (Read Comment #8):
http://textslastnight.com/view/received-texts/2677

Today is the first day of the rest of your life...

Mon, 15 Jun 2009 18:22:06 GMT

What? Where'd the rest of my life go?

Funny links!

Michael Moore's still-untitled doc about the economic crisis!!!
http://www.aint-it-cool-news.com/node/41405

Are Big Media Sites Like Hulu "Anti-Consumer, Anti-Media Employees, Anti-America"?
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/are-big-media-sites-like-hulu-anti-consumer-anti-media-employees-anti-america/

SKTimeStamp Adjusts File Creation Dates:
http://lifehacker.com/5291091/sktimestamp-adjusts-file-creation-dates

The Loop Controls Your TV Like the Wii for $100:
http://gizmodo.com/5290975/the-loop-controls-your-tv-like-the-wii-for-100

How to Tell if Your Son is Gay?
http://img190.imageshack.us/img190/4060/sonisgay6108286.jpg

I'm seeing babies today!

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 21:49:59 GMT

It looks like I'm gonna get to hold 'em too. And my presentation is done (but more work to come).

Still, life is good. :)

Here's some weekend links for ya...

Indie Filmmaking - 35 Tips From Experts:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/indie-filmmaking-35-tips-from-experts/

Bush makes parachute jump on 85th birthday:
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2009/06/12/bush-makes-parachute-jump-on-85th-birthday-talks-about-issues/

George Lucas, then and now:
http://www.uberpix.net/673/george-lucas-now-and-then/

The 100 best movie lines...in 200 seconds:
http://www.liquidgeneration.com/Media/Videos/LG_Originals/Top_10_Lists/100_Best_Movie_Lines_in_200_Seconds/

Work and links...

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 17:13:19 GMT

Such is my life. Sigh...

Funny links!

Mr. Longbaugh Hints At The Glorious Madness That Is Rob Cohen's MEDIEVAL!
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41370

Martin Scorsese Goes B-Movie Crazy In Brand New SHUTTER ISLAND Trailer!
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41368

What does a showrunner’s assistant do?
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2009/showrunner-asst

A funny T-shirt:
http://igotkittypryde.blogspot.com/2009/06/funny-stuff.html

Using the Red One Camera to Make a 'Living Movie Poster':
http://gizmodo.com/5286954/using-the-red-one-camera-to-make-a-living-movie-poster

Why Google Bothered to Appeal a $761 Small Claims Case (and Won):
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/aaron-greenspan/why-google-bothered-to-ap_b_213176.html

The 7 Trippiest Sid & Marty Krofft Shows:
http://www.tvmunchies.com/2009/06/7-trippiest-sid-marty-krofft-shows.html

A Bannana Scaring the crap out of people:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6uI_EQLoWI

The babies are here!

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 00:18:28 GMT

For those who are interested...

The twins arrived between 3-3:30pm today.

Xander (Alexander - boy) arrived weighing 4 pounds 1 ounce.

Angelia (girl) arrived weighing 3 pounds 5 ounces.

The boy arrived screaming, but the girl needed some help breathing (although she's fine now). My sis is good too (thank God).

A guy at my work just told me about his niece that arrived weighing 2 pounds 8 ounces and said she was fine, so that makes me feel better.

Everyone sounds good. I look forward to seeing the twins out of the neonatal unit and home where I can hold 'em.

Keep on praying though, every bit helps. :)

Cheers!

I was here till 8pm last night working...

Wed, 10 Jun 2009 18:22:00 GMT

What's up with 'dat?

Also, it looks like I'll probably be an uncle before the day is through. Everything should be okay. The babies will be small, but big enough (with the help of some neonatal equipment).

Keep on praying!

Funny links!

SAG Membership Votes "Yes" Overwhelmingly To Ratify New Theatrical & TV Contract With AMPTP - well, actors ain't rocket scientists...no surprise there:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/sag-membership-overwhelmingly-votes-yes-to-ratify-new-tvtheatrical-contract-with-amptp/

Upcoming Tech That Will Rock Your World:
http://lifehacker.com/5285358/upcoming-tech-that-will-rock-your-world

The secret to Palm Pre dev mode lies in the Konami code:
http://www.engadget.com/2009/06/10/the-secret-to-palm-pre-dev-mode-lies-in-the-konami-code/

Total Cost of Ownership - iPhone 3G S versus Palm Pre versus Android G1:
http://www.billshrink.com/blog/iphone-versus-palm-pre-versus-android/

Is it time to drop your iPhone plan and buy a MiFi?
http://www.tuaw.com/2009/06/09/is-it-time-to-drop-your-iphone-plan-and-buy-a-mifi/

12 Funniest TV Show-Inspired Tattoos - funny...or scary:
http://www.tvmunchies.com/2009/06/12-funniest-tv-show-inspired-tattoos.html

A Large Collection Of (Un)Intentionally Funny News Headlines:
http://www.bannedinhollywood.com/20-unintentionally-funny-news-headlines/

More prayers please...

Tue, 09 Jun 2009 18:52:55 GMT

My sister took a turn for the worse (not like she was going to die, but like they'd have to yank the babies out), but then pulled out of it. Still, it's looking like I'll be meeting my new nephew and niece by the end of the week. Let's hope they're at least 4 pounds apiece with good lungs.

Mo' prayers, mo' betta.

Thanks all!

Funny links!

La La La La La La Smurf World Record:
http://www.tmz.com/2009/06/09/la-la-la-la-la-la-smurf-world-record/

The Ten Craziest Celebrity Trainwrecks Caught On Video:
http://www.liquidgeneration.com/Media/Videos/LG_Originals/Top_10_Lists/10_Craziest_Celebrity_Trainwrecks/

The 10 Worst Songs to Lose Your Virginity To:
http://www.funkjelly.com/2009/06/10-worst-songs-to-lose-your-virginity.html

A Saved by the Bell reunion of sorts:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/76560/late-night-with-jimmy-fallon-saved-by-the-bell-reunion-update-3

Sorry about the no-post Friday...

Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:41:02 GMT

Super-busy day of work and all that.

Are you getting tired of that excuse yet? I am.

Anyhow, I was busy running around this weekend because my sister (with the twins in her belly) is in the hospital. Her body is having a difficult time. As mentioned, she's only 5'2", and not really built for twins. She wasn't good Thursday or Friday, bounced back a bit on Saturday, and was doing well Sunday. She's going to be in the hospital till the babies are born (or her body necessitates removing the babies). If she can make it to Thursday, that's 32 weeks which is pretty good. If she can hold out longer, even better.

Gotta go now. Bad virus on my computer. In the meantime though, say a prayer for my sis...

Funny links!

Rap Chop Slap Chop - I have one!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWRyj5cHIQA

HowButWHAT?? James Cameron, David Fincher, Zack Snyder and Gore Verbinski To Co-Direct New HEAVY METAL Movie??
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41330

Laurie Perlman vs Toby Emmerich, Again - an interesting lesson in Hollywood fun...not:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/laurie-perlman-vs-toby-emmerich-again/

Han Solo...Magnum P.I.:
http://igotkittypryde.blogspot.com/2009/06/holy-shit-i-love-this.html

Load Your Wii Games from a Hard Disk, Part II
http://lifehacker.com/5280957/load-your-wii-games-from-a-hard-disk-part-ii

Panasonic Goes Cheap, Light With the HDC-SD10, TM10 1080p Camcorders - purdy:
http://i.gizmodo.com/5282844/panasonic-goes-cheap-light-with-the-hdc+sd10-tm10-1080p-camcorders

6 Ridiculous Sex Myths (That Are Actually True):
http://www.cracked.com/article_17432_6-ridiculous-sex-myths-that-are-actually-true.html

I'm so funny...

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 17:31:17 GMT

I found a neon pink tank top that someone had left in the office back in the 90's that's about 4 sizes smaller than should fit me. I decided it would be funny if I put it on and run around the office, so I did...and then two customers came in.

I was behind my desk, so I tried to work like nothing was going on...except I couldn't stop laughing. And neither could anyone else in the office.

Plus it didn't help everyone in the office was taking my picture with their cell phones.

I'm a doofus.And no, I'm not joking. If I'm fired, you now know why. ;)

Funny links!

DOUBLE TROUBLE - NBC Edicts Already Killing Jay Leno Show By Favoring Conan:
http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/double-trouble-nbc-edicts-already-killing-the-jay-leno-show-by-favoring-conan/

Farewell, Grasshopper. David Carradine Is Gone...
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41305

Josh Friedman on the end of the Terminator show:
http://hucksblog.blogspot.com/2009/06/boy-in-bubble.html

How to ward off writer's block - I write about not writing:
http://lifehacker.com/5278762/stop-writing-mid+sentence-to-ward-off-writers-block

I'm busier than a puppy with two peters...

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 19:26:21 GMT

I love that saying! Gotta get back to work!

Funny links!

A Positively Aggravating Spy Pic of Josh Brolin as JONAH HEX! And 2 great ones!
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41289

Twitter in Hollywood - check it before meetings:
http://leegoldberg.typepad.com/a_writers_life/2009/06/check-twitter-before-meetings.html

Would You Pay This Douche $300 To Drive You In His Ferrari?
http://jalopnik.com/5276172/would-you-pay-this-douche-300-to-drive-you-in-his-ferrari

The Looney Toons take a cue from Itchy and Scratchy and stop fucking around and start getting real:
http://thechive.com/2009/06/looney-toons-on-killing-spree-courtesy-of-artist-james-caughty-gallery/

The 13 Most Awesomely Offensive Bruno Moments:
http://coedmagazine.com/2009/06/02/13-most-awesomely-offensive-bruno-moments/